“But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them- yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.” 1 Corinthians 15:10
Some people go to college and know exactly what they want to study, study it, love it, and go out into the world. I’m half way through college and still don’t really know one thing that I want to study. There are many things that I could do and do well. Things that are interesting. There is much use for my muchness. You can’t really major in “dabbling in everything”. And now knowing that when I commit I commit hard, I might be kinda scared to just pick ONE thing and go for it. Because if I get into it and hate it, I’m kinda stuck with it till I graduate. No bueno.
Have I considered running away? Dropping out? Definitely. And more regularly than I care to really admit. But God keeps me here for now. “Wait, my child.” It it by His grace that I’m still here. By His grace that I’ve even gotten this far and not lost my mind.
People want a plan of action for my life. I’ve learned not to set too much in store by those plans. Plan for the day, okay. Plan for 5 years, nope. Most of the time, I get it wrong. God has something better. Always. “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21 I know I can’t sit and wait and do nothing. But I also know that God will set my path straight. Take a step, but be ready to turn.
God has been all about teaching me about glory. Which makes sense because that’s our purpose: to glorify Him. He’s given me empty tables and already set up tray stands for my newbie food running skills to develop. He uses my friends to raise money for camp shirts. He gives us talented friends that can design said camp shirts. He baptizes my dearest ones in a public proclamation of Him. He gives me ideas and vision for my internship. He gives me a strange body to keep Him in.
God is weird because all of this glory can exist while there is still so much mess and stress going on. His kingdom’s gonna be wild because it’ll be all glory all the time. Good thing we won’t have these fleshy cages anymore or I don’t know how I’ll be able to handle it.
I’m beginning to be less of a believer in coincidence. That stuff is all God.
“You may not trust the promises of the change I’ve shown..” (Mumford and Sons) Please. Trust the work that God is doing in me. Maybe you can’t see it, but it’s there. Let me work harder. Give me another chance as God gives me a new chance every morning. Let me love Jesus and feed people. Let me let His glory be revealed.